Thursday, March 5, 2009

I Guess I Never Got My Popcorn Ready

March 5th 2009,

A date which will live in infamy. (Well, maybe not)

In case you live on "The Island" in LOST, and your busy running from "The Others" and that smokey monster thing (seriously what is that?), then you may have missed the reports late last night and early this morning. WR Terrell Owens was released by my beloved Dallas Cowboys. Hold on I need a minute.....


Ok I'm Good.

There had been much speculation that Terrell could be released or traded by the draft, but that was all laid to rest when Jerry Jones (the owner) came out and said that the Cowboys are going to keep Terrell Owens. So all was honky dory until very early this morning when Jerry Jones (the GM) decided to cut the future Hall of Fame wide receiver. Great Jerry, I Swear to god, you are losing your mind. You know how some old people just cant drive anymore? Yet they just continue to drive and put everyone in danger around them on the road. That's Jerry Jones with the Dallas Cowboys. Not only do the Cowboys lose their top offensive play maker, they lose the fear that he imposed on opposing defensive coordinators. People don't understand how much he freed up the rest of the field for guys like Jason Witten and Patrick Crayton, and apparently Jerry is one of those people. But anyway back to Terrell...

So how do we define the Terrell Owens Era in Dallas? Say what you want about him blowing up this team, but I refuse to believe it. He literally blew up the 49ers and Eagles locker room, but I don't think that situation applies to the Cowboys. The situation in Dallas was more media driven than anything and I don't think that he was as bad an influence as everyone thinks. Now I do agree that he had a minor influence on the locker room, it would be naive (thanks A-Rod) of me to think otherwise. But you cannot justify what this guy did on the field for 3 years, and basically his whole career. In his 3 years with the Cowboys Terrell Owens had just under 3600 yards receiving and 38 touchdowns. That's almost 1200 yards a year with 13 touchdowns! No one can argue with me that this guy hurt the team more than he helped it. I don't see it.

But Terrell Owens in his press conference 3 years ago told us "Getcha Popcorn Ready!" Well Terrell my question for you is, What did we need the popcorn for? Sure you were great for the regular season, but we're sick of that. The Cowboys haven't won a playoff game in....hold on...I still can't believe this...14 YEARS!!! So Mr. Owens, what did I waste all this popcorn for, the regular season? The fact is that despite all of your success in the regular season, and all of your gaudy numbers you put up, and all of the so called controversy that you brought to our team....we didn't win when it counted. And that's where I have the problem with you Mr. Owens because when things aren't going right you cant look your self in the mirror and blame yourself. It always has to be someone else that you blame. You can't just pick your teammates up when the chips are down, you'd rather dance around with ESPN's Ed Werder, or start your reality show. You had no focus on winning, despite the fact that you said that's all you wanted to do.

So this is the end of the road for you in Dallas, Terrell. So I'm just going to pull a Parcells and call you 'the player' from now on. I have to drop your jersey, my support, and my fan hood towards you. (I'm going to keep the TO tees though, basically because their hilarious.
It's not going to come easy, because I did enjoy watching you on the field. But I guess, I never got my popcorn ready.


  1. I can agree that the TO tees are really funny. Nice work. Now the question is, who signs him?

  2. Like I told you before fam

    1. they better find someone to replace those numbers

    2. they should have traded

    3 they are about to cut ties with RW38

    4. almost 20 million in DEAD CAP MONEY


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